


Do You?

by cxsmicdxst



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Break Up, Gay Keith (Voltron), Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Pining Keith (Voltron), klance, klangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-06 23:17:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11611011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cxsmicdxst/pseuds/cxsmicdxst
Summary: Stress gets to us all at some point in life; what can you do when it makes you lose the one thing you cherish the most?





	Do You?

_Will you shut it, Lance?_  
 _All you do is mess up the missions!_  
 _We don’t need you now._  
 _Stay out of the way._  
The words resonated inside his mind like a broken record, something so awful to hear that he couldn’t help but scream into his pillow; the pain it caused him to remember, to think about it, the loneliness he felt deep within his heart, all those feelings that would not go away and keep tormenting him for a long time had created a nest in his chest. It had been weeks now, but still the wounds created were fresh, both on his skin and his soul.  
Keith had managed to lose everything he had gained recently: weight, strength, faith, and most importantly, love. He wasn’t sure as to why it had happened exactly, as his anger didn’t let him think often before he spoke, but it did, and God was it bad.  
The fights against the Galra always left everyone in a very dizzy mood, with Allura weakened due to her continued use of Altean powers, Coran tending to her, and the paladins not really in the mood to think about the next time they’d have to go through something like that. The only relief he had found in all of this was the support from his boyfriend Lance, to whom he had confessed only months before, and he felt very excited when his feelings were reciprocated. Everything was good: the others approved of the relationship, arguing that those who fight a lot often end up together, they felt comfortable with each other, and there wasn’t a single night when Keith didn’t feel lucky to have someone like Lance next to him.  
But something had changed during the latest battle.  
There was tension in the air, seeing that Zarkon had grown stronger than ever before, and naturally every last ounce of the paladins’ and the tigers’ power was put into jeopardy, leaving them both physically and mentally exhausted and, in some cases, scarred. It was all quick; Shiro was ready to deal the final blow to the unknowing emperor when Lance signalled the arrival of more enemies, distracting him for only a second and causing him to miss an attack that came out of nowhere and to lose control of the tiger, which could’ve ended badly.  
It was then that Keith shouted those words through the intercom only out of anger, shocking everybody else.  
Once they were back on the castle, Lance was the first one to walk away from everyone, not even saying a word or looking back at his boyfriend. It wasn’t until later that it dawned on Keith that he had screwed up big time, and that it would probably be the last time he would have to fix things before it was too late. He tried talking to him, knocking on his door when he wouldn’t come out, even passing messages via the others, but none of it proved effective as every time, the blue paladin evaded his sole presence every time he took the chance.  
Devastated, he grew more and more tired until, one day, he decided to finally put an end to the ongoing sadness. He waited until everyone was already asleep to sneak out of his room, quietly making his way to Lance’s room. There, he knocked on the door four separate times, as it was their secret way of knowing it was each other calling. As he didn’t get a reply, he turned around and was about to leave, when suddenly he heard the sound of the automatic door opening.  
“It’s late, Keith; what do you want?” the sharp tone on Lance’s voice made him shiver a little bit, but it was the first time he spoke to him directly since all that had taken place. He knew he had to take the leap before it was too late, and he turned around slowly. His eyes met the other boy’s, almost void of any emotion.  
“Can I come in?”  
Sighing, Lance moved aside, letting him step in after which he closed the door once more. They sat on the bed and, with a yawn, Lance asked, “Is there anything you want? I was getting ready to go to sleep already.”  
“I’m sorry if I interrupted your beauty routine,” Keith said, now visibly annoyed, “but I just… I felt we needed to talk, and you’ve been avoiding me ever since-”  
“Ever since you told me I’m fucking useless?”  
Silence filled the room as he stared at the ground, the lump on his throat now making it hard to swallow. There were no excuses for what he had done, he knew it, but he was ready to do whatever it took if it meant he could gain his boyfriend back. “I was angry, okay?” he started, “I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry. All I wanted was for the fight to be over, I wanted everyone to be safe, and overall, I wanted to be back with you – I had never been as mad at something as I was at the sole thought of you getting harmed, and I said that without thinking. You know you’re useful for a lot of things and-”  
Lance raised a hand, signalling him to stop talking. There was a small smile on his face, but everything else was hard to read. “Just stop, please. I don’t need false words of hope right now,” he said slowly before scratching his nape. “I know exactly what you meant back then, and it’s okay; everyone’s allowed to have their own opinion about what’s going on with the team. It’s nothing I don’t already know. And we both know it’s not going to be the same from now on. Not for us, not for anyone.”  
His words were soft and calm, but Keith could feel the hurt in each one of them, making his heart drop to the floor; hoping he wouldn’t mess up again, he reached out to grab Lance’s hand, but was surprised when he moved his away. “Can I ask you something, then? Please, answer honestly. I won’t be upset.” Their gazes met once more and it was then that Keith could see the tears rolling quietly down his partner’s face. He wanted nothing more than just jump at him and make it all okay, but being the source of the pain is never easy, even more so when it’s the one person you cherish the most. “Do you… still love me the same?”  
There was no reply to the question, and that was exactly what he had feared; instead, Lance looked away, as if the answer was painted on the opposite wall. He couldn’t expect anything else, could he? Not after what he had said. Not after what he had done to him, his lover, his best friend, the one who knew exactly what to do for him to be alright. He only had to be there for him too, and that’s the one thing he had failed on. “It’s not that I don’t love you,” Lance started saying after a moment, “It’s just that-”  
“It’s your turn to stop,” Keith said, getting up and not letting him say anything else; he had already heard what he wanted to. “I’m really sorry that I hurt you. I love you with all that I am, but I understand you cannot return it right now. I must look pathetic right now, so, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be leaving.” He muttered a small ‘good luck’ before he walked the way back to his room with his fists clenched and his eyes tearing up.  
There was more, so much more that he would’ve wished to say, but so little had actually come out, and he felt totally helpless now. Things had not gone the way he wanted them to, and he lost the most important person for him in a matter of days. _How foolish_ , he told himself, _how foolish of me to think that it could last_. He was alone once more, and he already feared the cold, sleepless nights that were to come.  
But he understood, and the loneliness had never felt so bitter.


End file.
